Gaggin' in the Grove: You're kidding, right?

I’m not sure if people are getting dumber, or if there is an overriding fear that if things are not precisely spelled out, someone will do something stupid and sue a company or individual.

            Case in point.

            In the not too recent past, I was on a flight and noticed that in the lavatories (those things are too small to be called bathrooms) in addition to the pictures stickers that remind you not to smoke, where the call button is, etc., is one on the toilet depicting a person sitting on one as if to say “and here’s where you defecate”.

            Really.

            I can’t help but wonder how much money was spent in the design and production of those stickers.  I can’t help but wonder what ever prompted the need for these stickers.  Was it based on flight crew observations?  I mean, was there an airline that feature an announcement that said “In the event of an in-cabin defecation, a roll of toilet paper will drop from the ceiling…”?  You would think that someone who figured out how to make a flight reservation, keep their luggage within airline and/or TSA guidelines and go through security would at least know how to use the restroom, oh sorry, lavatory. I guess it gives a whole new meaning to friendly skies.

            Case in point No. 2.

            Out of the clear blue, my wife decided we needed a new hair dryer.  So with coupon in hand, off I went to check out the selections.  Another case that supports Will Rogers’ claim that “We are the first nation in the history of the world to go to the poor house in an automobile…”  With styled hair.  A brief aside, the selection of hair dryers is almost laughable – they all have the same power, but thanks to product marketers, they all have gimmicks – which, of course add to the price. And what the heck is diffuser?  It sounds like something needed at Village Board meetings.

            With new hair dryer in hand, I eagerly awaited my wife’s approval, which was quickly earned.  Fortunately.

            With the replacement made, I decided – for whatever reason – to look at the directions.  Why I do not know because there is not much to plugging it in, selecting a speed and temperature, and drying one’s hair (the ion switch did require an extra five seconds of reading).  As with any electric appliance, the manufacturer gave safety instructions, which included the usual – don’t use near water, keep away from heated surfaces and do not use if the cord or plug is damaged.

            But one warning made me wonder just how stupid some people are.  The warning?  “Never use while sleeping.”

            Really.  Honestly.  Seriously.

            Either someone has too much time on their hands, or it’s a corporate joke.

            Can you imagine this scene?  “Good night honey, hope the hair dryer doesn’t keep you awake?”

            And talk about having a bad hair day.  “Geez, I slept with my hair dryer last night and can’t do a thing with it.”

            You just have to wonder what kind of person needs to be reminded not to use their hair dryer while sleeping.

            Oh, I know, the same person who has to be reminded what a toilet is for.