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Football Coach Concerned About Bullying

Letter to the editor.

Is the TCYFL (The Chicagoland Youth Football League) doing enough to stop the rampant unsportsmanlike conduct and bullying handed out each week by the Big Ten Buffalo Grove Lights football team led by Head Coach Joey Weber? The communities that have played them this year don’t think so. I also don’t believe they have done enough, if anything at all. 

I coach the Lake Zurich Flames Lights team and we played Buffalo Grove on Sunday Sept. 25th in Buffalo Grove. During pre-game warm-ups the Buffalo Grove team jogged around my Lake Zurich team as we warmed up and verbally assaulted my players using profanities I cannot put in print in this family newspaper. A few minutes later they came jogging back around and singled out one of my players and assaulted him with profanities. Meanwhile my players said nothing. I told them all week this might happen, and if it did, to ignore it. I had been told by other coaches that previously played them to be aware. The Buffalo Grove team then proceeded to complete their warm-ups not more than 20 yards from my team. Their warm up chant included a gay slur directed at my team, which they repeated several times in pre-game and at half time. Their coaches stood by and did nothing to stop them.

During the game Buffalo Grove had an unsportsmanlike penalty called on them for taunting. They went on to beat us 28 to 0. What is really sad about this whole situation is that they have a great team and they don’t need to act this way. I know several players on the Buffalo Grove team and it is not in their nature to act in this manner. The behavior and actions of a football team is the direct responsibility of its head coach. Only the individuals on the Buffalo Grove team can say whether or not Joey Weber encourages this behavior, but anyone who has played against him can say he certainly does nothing to stop it. 

Bullying has no place in youth sports. We have seen and read too many stories on bullying and the results of bullying. I have coached 13 years in the Lake Zurich Flames organization and 4 years at the High School level and I have never come across a team so bent on winning that everything else, including good sportsmanship, is set aside. Anyone who has played or coached competitive sports will tell you that their goal is to win, but the overwhelming majority will also tell you there is a line they will not cross, especially in youth sports, and unfortunately that line has been crossed all season long by the Buffalo Grove Big Ten Lights team - and the TCYFL needs to do something about it. If nothing is done we are telling these players it is ok to act this way, and how is that helping them? This is a black eye for youth sports and the TCYFL for letting this type of behavior continue. 

The Chicago Bears and Northwestern Wildcats are associated with the TCYFL which professes its mission to be: The TCYFL will encourage and inspire our youth, regardless of race, religious affiliation/belief, gender, creed, ethnicity, or national origin; and facilitate participation in practicing good health, citizenship, character and sportsmanship. First and foremost, the TCYFL promotes the welfare and wellbeing of the player, free from the adult lust for glory. I wonder how they would react if they knew the TCYFL was turning a blind eye to rampant unsportsmanlike conduct and bullying?  

A Very concerned Parent, Youth Football Coach and High School Teacher,

Jim Brown

Lake Zurich

Jen October 14, 2011 at 09:25 PM
That's all you care about? Then, please, put your money where your mouth is. Only care about your self pride and stop caring about this forum. The reason I wonder if BG is proud of what you say is because you've said to one person the following: Leave it alone, give it a rest, focus on raising your children, get off the computer, deal with your own problems, nobody feels sorry for you, grow up, take your b.s. somewhere else, chill out, and take your problems somewhere else. I think I speak for EVERYONE when I say that nobody likes being bossed around. Nobody likes being bullied. Thank you for taking your time to represent Buffalo Grove with self pride. I hope they are as proud of you as your are of yourself.
Z October 14, 2011 at 09:52 PM
Haha you are missing the point. I'm trying to get you two overprotective parents to STOP commenting not continue commenting because I also think I speak for EVERYONE when I say shut up, everybody is sick of hearing you two complain about all the problems in the world. Stop commenting and go spend time with your family or do something productive.
Erica Williams October 14, 2011 at 10:06 PM
Z - No can do. When did you become my boss?
Z October 15, 2011 at 12:05 AM
Jen: As far as the imaginary line that i have created no worries only fans of Weber are able to cross it so if you are a Jim Brown (soft) fan then you are in no risk of crossing that line because i created it and i judge who crosses the line or not! I am setting the best example for my children because now they know how cool and awesome i am! Me! Myself! I! But remember the communities thoughts matter more to me than my own because my impression on the community comes first before everything else. Erica: Yeah Jen! You tell them Jen! Jen: Erica you know i always get the last word!!!
Z October 15, 2011 at 12:10 AM
You two are extremely repetitive. Every time i read one of your posts it is the same thing every time. By posting you are not going to change anything. You are making absolutely zero positive effects on this community. So please follow my advice when i tell you STOP COMMENTING!
Abigail October 15, 2011 at 12:11 AM
You really need to grow up.
Z October 15, 2011 at 01:10 AM
Hey Abigail thanks for the advice!!!!!!!!!
abc October 16, 2011 at 02:25 PM
Fyi, there is a boy nick-named "Q" who played for Joey Weber on the Bills. He has moved on to play successfully for Stevenson, and has no reason to stretch the truth about his past experiences with Joey Weber.
Pocketda Rebate October 16, 2011 at 06:43 PM
Alan Danenberg - Could you have retired "Art" for good? Is "abc" the new "Art"? Just trying to keep up with your reality. When you responded that you "really don't need to defend yourself" {8:50pm on Wednesday, October 12, 2011}, you did anyway. Interesting.
Alex Fale October 17, 2011 at 03:07 AM
You all really need to get a life. Quit living through your kids, and the reality of your horrible life that you cover up through your kids accomplishments because at your age, you are out of accomplishments, and most of you are not even a has been, but never been.
Jen October 17, 2011 at 03:21 PM
Hey, Erica! While "z" was putting together the adorable satire that follows this post, I was actually with my two younger children watching my oldest play football. So, while I was actually following the advice "go spend time with your family" without provocation, Mr. z was being quite productive by composing the adorable diatribe for everyone to see, below. Don't you have a better appreciation for his advice?
Jen October 17, 2011 at 06:29 PM
Jay/Joey, I have stated it three times already. My son does not play on the Middleweight team. He plays on a pac-10 Lightweight team. We do not use gold or silver or any other color to distinguish levels of play, so I'm not sure how to further distinguish this for you. My son is not chachalove56. I have asked my children if they know who this is, and they have assured me that they have no idea. Of course, I have used this whole situation to explain to them the difference between debate and insults. As I have discussed with you before, Jay/Joey... I have not resorted to name calling (dumb, white trash) or speculating on peoples' personal lives (suggesting a cheating husband). These are examples of insults, and not educated debating. Thank you for assisting me in teaching my children right from wrong. I do appreciate the service you have provided. Let me make this crystal clear: I am not justifying this kid's comments. He most likely is, however, a child. And.... may I also point out, the only way I am associated with Jim Brown is simply that both of our boys play for the Flames. I have only rung in because of the hatred spread by the BG supporters on this forum, and because of the boys I do know on Brown's team who told members of my family about the poor sportsmanship before this letter was submitted to The Patch. Heck, Jay/Joey... the things you have said on this forum have been dripping with hatred. I find it incredible you would point fingers.
Abigail October 17, 2011 at 10:53 PM
Amen, Jen. I'm tired of hearing all of this too--especially name-calling and suggesting a cheating husband is childish. People who resort to this have already lost their argument when that's all they have. Maybe one of these two posters is actually one of the football players.
Z October 18, 2011 at 02:52 AM
Point fingers? Are you serious...you have been wasting your life on this forum pointing fingers. I honestly can't say I have ever met such a hypocrite in my life. Once again leave the issue alone and get off this forum. I'll repeat myself you are making absolutely no positive impacts and you are not helping this community whatsoever.
Z October 18, 2011 at 02:58 AM
Yes, however he never played for Weber in seventh grade and if you check out his article in the patch, he gives all his credit to the Bills.
Erica Williams October 18, 2011 at 11:50 AM
Z - Quit being a bully.
Shesjr October 18, 2011 at 04:30 PM
Wow I had to go and get my box of popcorn just to finish reading the comments posted on this thread. All I can say is there should be zero tolerance for unsportsmanlike conduct from players, coaches and parents. I don't think it's the fact that BG has a winning program that has everybody up in arms. Congrats to them for that! It’s the perceived blatant disregard for the sport as a whole and the promoting of personal agendas at the children’s expense. I disagree with some of the other posters saying LZ is sour because BG is winning football games. In my humble opinion and from what little I saw on the you tube film, it’s clear that the BG players are show-boating and high-fiven each other after that LZ player was down. This is unacceptable and since I was not present with his team on that day, I can’t say for sure that Mr. Weber did or did not correct his players for their nasty display on the field. If he did call them on it, he did the right thing. If he turned a blind eye to it then that is a huge problem; I will never know either way! Mr. Brown’s letter was not even addressing this game however; it was referring to the behavior of the BG Big 10 Lightweight players towards his team at the game they played on Sept 25th. Foolish pride is just that,,,,foolish and my advice to any coach reading this would be humility goes way further in helping teach kids valuable lessons way more than pride does.
Shesjr October 18, 2011 at 05:13 PM
Phil bullying is being used to describe the situation because that is exactly what Mr. Webers team demonstrated to the LZ team that day. Winning by BG happened too; let's not confuse the two. Unless you were right there to wittness what happened and can report otherwise, then we must go on the account given by Mr. Brown that the BG team was bullying his team. If it quacks like a duck and walks like a duck, it's a duck!!!
Erica Williams October 18, 2011 at 06:19 PM
Well said Shesjr.
Z October 18, 2011 at 08:16 PM
Add another one to the list of delusional lz parents...
Shesjr October 18, 2011 at 08:26 PM
When you consider a matter with a fool, you become one!
Z October 19, 2011 at 03:49 AM
When did you become my boss?
Shesjr October 19, 2011 at 02:31 PM
http://facebook.com/bullyinggone
Jen October 19, 2011 at 02:48 PM
I don't know, shesjr, but if you log out, you can see your last comment, along with an eye-opener from ex jw player. Maybe the Patch can fix this?
Shesjr October 19, 2011 at 04:11 PM
For those of you who are flagging my original post sent on Tuesday 10/18 @ 11:30 am as "inappropriate" please step up and say how and why it is offensive and should be deleted? Clearly the editors of the Patch did not see it as offensive because it got restored. Just because you disagree with what's being said does not mean it's offensive. Stop crying wolf!
Pocketda Rebate October 20, 2011 at 02:10 AM
Alan Danenberg - Have you retired "Art" & "abc" for good? How did you come up with "Shesjr"? Once again, just trying to keep up with your reality. Got the "picture" Alan? As far as offensive, though I didn't flag your comment ... maybe it's YOUR personal agenda that's the issue?
Abigail October 20, 2011 at 03:10 AM
Obviously you don't realize that when you change your screen name on this blog your name changes on EVERY comment you have posted. Therefore, Alan Danenberg could not have changed his screen name because comments made by "Alan Danenberg" still remain.
Shesjr October 20, 2011 at 05:49 PM
Hi Pocketda, Alan has nothing to do with me. Shesjr has been a handle I have used my whole life, not just here.
Pocketda Rebate October 20, 2011 at 06:38 PM
Some use multiple email addresses to create different "handles" for their anonymous comments. Some change, some retire and some stay consistent.
Cristel Mohrman (Editor) October 20, 2011 at 07:23 PM
Thank you all for sharing your views on this topic. At this time, I am closing this letter for comments. Please see my "letter from the editor" at http://patch.com/A-nbWz

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